Me + House = Meredith and Cristina - The Twisted Sisters

So one of the things about me and House is that there are times when we don't speak for weeks, maybe even months on end (and usually when that happens it's on her, not me). But when we do speak, we have the connections like nothing ever happened and that everything is all good. I love House. House loves me. We love each other and we are twisted sisters. One of my favorite shows on TV is Grey's Anatomy. One of the reasons it speaks to me because I see a lot of me in two of the main characters, Meredith and Bailey. I mostly see Bailey in me because she's short, bossy, brilliant and can quote Star Wars. The times when I see the Meredith in me are in her interactions with Cristina. Recently on the show, Cristina was having a hard time sleeping since her husband was at work (please don't get me started on the whole Owen/Cristina thing) so she went to Meredith's house and climbed in the bed with her. This type of behavior wasn't uncommon between the two of them. After all, they are twisted sisters. This reminded me of the time House and I lived together. It wasn't uncommon for us to go a little while without speaking, even though we lived in the same house. She had her moments and I had mine where we just didn't want to be bothered. It took a long time for me to not take it personally but eventually I got there.

One night, the summer after I graduated from undergrad, House and I had somethings going on, independently. I remember laying in my bed and hearing a knock at the door. It was House and she was having a moment. My first instinct with a lot of situations is to understand them and to try to comfort and/or nurture the person involved. But House was at a point where there weren't enough words to comfort her. She just wanted to come in get in my bed (luckily I was in bed alone that night) and just lay down. Flashing back to that moment, remembering that moment, makes my eyes water just a little bit because it was one of the most powerful, if not the most powerful moment in our relationship. She didn't want to talk about anything, she didn't talk about anything, she just laid at the foot of my bed and went to sleep. And in the morning, she got up and carried on like nothing ever happened. Every now and then, we flash back to that moment and really realize that we are in fact twisted sisters. 

We talked earlier this week about Grey's when we realized that if we ever got married and lived in the same town, that our husbands would have to understand (like Derek and Owen are trying to understand) is that we're twisted sisters and some times, there will be some situations where we'll have to sleep in the same bed. 

I love my twisted sister...

Me, My Momma and the Birthday Shenanigans!

After yesterday’s (Monday) events, I thought that I would have a different perspective on my relationship with my momma. And to an extent, I do. Actually, since my father’s been sick, I’ve had a different perception of my mother. But the shit that has really pissed me off has happened within the last Four days. My birthday was on Friday. My mom called me at work to ask if I was coming home before going to the Ball game, I told her that I was but only to change clothes. She said that she hadn’t gotten my birthday cake and didn’t see the need to get one since I wasn’t coming home. (Footnote: Every birthday, every year, every member of the family gets a strawberry shortcake from Neldam’s bakery. It’s been a long standing family tradition) When she said this, I was blown. I got to my parents’ house and she was fussing (because that’s what she does) and told me to go get my cake out of her car and to take it to the Ball park. What the fuck? Why the hell would I take my birthday cake to the ballpark when it’s a family tradition? She then proceeds to yell how she is mad as hell that she didn’t get a birthday cake for the last two years and she was not going to forget it as long as she was alive! Are you fucking serious! You choose my birthday to fucking fuss about a birthday cake from March! How the fuck do you do that to someone? I was so shaken up, I couldn’t even think straight. I put the cake in their refrigerator and went home to get ready for the baseball game. But I was so blown.

Oh wait, I forgot! Either Wednesday or Thursday, I was sitting in my parents’ living room talking about my upcoming birthday. My dad asked me what I wanted for my birthday. The only thing I really want is my Cole Haan pumps (black, patent leather peep toe  the only problem is that they are $300! Yikes!) My mother says to my father (in front of me) if you buy her some $300 shoes, I’ll break your fuckin’ legs. Wow, over some shoes? Really! That’s a cold blooded game in the streets.

So let’s recap, even before my birthday, you’re hating on my gift from my father, on my birthday you want to talk about YOUR birthday and what YOU didn’t get. Caught up, good.

(Footnote: I made the elaborate plan for my birthday – drink, dance, eat – repeat! I didn’t tell my parents’ about it because they never want to do anything that I like to do, even if it is my birthday.)

Oh I forgot to mention since, we’re talking about what does and doesn’t happen for birthdays. Apparently, the family tradition is to go out to dinner, the birthday person gets to decide. I haven’t been taken out for my birthday yet! And I’ve been home for FIVE FUCKING YEARS! I digress…

So I decided to go ahead and just get ready for my birthday. Everything after that point seemed to be cool. That was Friday.

So after Friday, I wake up Saturday morning with a friendly reminder that I am not pregnant, not like that would be a concern, but you know. (Footnote: why is it men over the age of 21, seem to have a problem when a woman mentions that she’s on her period. Dawg, you’re married with a daughter! Don’t act like you’ve never heard about a woman having a damn period!) I had somewhere to be on Saturday morning and I actually pulled myself together to make it happen. But why is it that my mom thinks that my sole purpose in life is to do the things that she doesn’t want to do. No, boo boo! It doesn’t work that way. Because she forgot my dad’s dialysis snacks and she didn’t want to take them to him, she felt like I should do it. Negative ghost rider!  I did the rest of the stuff that I had going on for the day and didn’t pay her any mind.

Now we’re at Sunday. I put together a pretty nice outfit. My long white floral dress, my black cardigan and some pink flip flops.  (There's a picture for your viewing pleasure) I felt like this was more that appropriate to wear to church especially since I wasn’t singing. My mother disagreed. Did she come to church, no? Was it because of my flip flops? Who knows. She really wasn’t pleased with my pink flip flops, which matched my dress to a T! Whatever. So fast forward to Sunday night, I said that I wanted to cut my cake at 7pm. Please tell me why, we didn’t cut the cake until damn near 7:30! And on top of that, I stood around looking stupid because no one wanted to sing Happy Birthday. (Footnote: if I acted the way everyone else acted about my birthday it would have been a major problem. Maybe I should start acting like these simpletons! Why the fuck is it when it comes to me it’s a fucking problem but let it be your shit and I am all about accommodating your punk ass – mostly my mom and my silly ass brothers. My dad seems to do fine with it. I guess I get it from him.) The birthday person should never have to start singing Happy Birthday to Me! Who does that? Camille Michelle Harvey. So I cut the cake, take my pieces of it and go home.

You would think the foolishness would stop. Nope. So Monday, I get home from work and my mother first asked me what I was going to wear with my shoes. I told her that I would wear whatever, which is fair because they are basic black pumps. No need to do anything fancy. She decided to say that she was going to get me a whole new outfit to wear with them. Cool, spend your money, Ms. Honey. Then she decides to start talking about some kids who got in trouble for wearing flip flops to the White House and how there is a certain protocol and shit. What the fuck are you talking about? Then she starts talking about what people from our old church would say about my flip flops. Ma, I don’t give a damn. And that’s basically what I told her. If you have a problem with something I am wearing, please feel free to make a contribution to my wardrobe by replacing it. I am not the one who gets hella caught up in what other people say or think about me, especially if they can’t verbalize it to me. The point was, she didn’t like the idea that I had on flip flops. But rather than say all that, she wanted to give some historical protocol bullshit about something that I could give a damn about anyway. If you don’t like it, say so. I’m still an adult so I wear what the fuck I want to!

And finally, I am on my way home from work today (Tuesday, yes, Tuesday). She calls me and asks if I took her spaghetti. Now, I have told my mother time again, if I take something from her, 9 times out of 10, I tell her OR she’ll see me take it so it’s not a big surprise when it comes up missing. I told her that I didn’t have it. As I am coming from the direction of Safeway, she is heading towards Safeway, I would imagine to get some spaghetti. I get to my parents’ house and see a nice huge pot of spaghetti sauce on the stove and some Italian Sausage on the counter. Hell yeah! I wanted some spaghetti! All good. I had a couple of spoonfuls of spaghetti (I really can eat it all by itself) and then I go into the living room to talk to my dad. My dad basically says that my mother thinks I lied about taking the spaghetti and I was mad at her. For real! I’m done! As I’ve already stated, if I am gonna take something you’ll know (except for the purple egg slicer, I didn’t say anything about that). But you’re gonna accuse me of lying about taking some spaghetti. I’m done. I was so mad, that I turned on my Wii Fit Plus and definitely got a great work out in. Now I am sitting in my kitchen, banging this blog out and ready to hop in the shower. I’m gonna try and get out of town this weekend because I don’t want to deal with the silly shit. Me and my momma.

#thatisall

The Watson in Me

I had a brief conversation with Wilson about Mr. Milk Dud, who has been in the middle of some questionable activity lately. Wilson asked me how did I acquire some information, I responded that I did some research the clues that I was given. When I did some further digging, I found out that Milk Dud is living a double life (translation = he has 2 FB pages). Additionally, information that I was looking for was later confirm after seeing the additional information on the 2nd page. 

What's to be learned from this Insane Moment:

People will show you who they are if you give them the chance.

Just because someone may look like you, doesn't mean they like you.

Sometimes it's not that deep, sometimes it is. The challenge is knowing which time you are in.

Life and love are much like playing cards. You can win or lose based on the hand you're dealt as well as the way you play the hand you're dealt. Sometimes you have to wait for the right card to have the winning hand. When in doubt, throw all your cards in, shuffle and start all over. 

Just When I Thought

So just when I thought that it was easier and harder at the same time, the reality was that there was nothing. Just a spot in the friend zone. And the more I think about it, not even a true friend, just the friend zone. I believe that friends have time for friends, maybe not much but some. Friendships and relationships, in order to be healthy can not be one sided. If one party is putting out all the energy and all the other is sucking the energy, it's not fair and it's one sided. And it's on to the next one...

It's Been A While

I know it's been a while since you've had a taste of my insane life. But the good news is when time passes like that, it makes for great story telling. The short version, some characters from the past have made guest appearances, some characters who were originally cast have been voted off the show. There have been lots of smiles, laughter and reflection. Oh the good times.

This One's Easier and Harder All at the Same Time

Mr. Milk Dud - he makes me smile from ear to ear.  I wish I could post a picture, this brotha is fine. I just have to shake my head and smile while I type that. There are parts of me, that make me want to tell him that he makes me smile. But what does that do? Nothing. This one's easy because he's so easy on the eyes. But it's also hard because I don't know what's going on in his world or more importanly, if there is room for me in his world. Maybe he's the nice guy that I'm looking for and the one that I deserve. This might not be insanity. This might be the start of something more.

Insanity by Email

I was thinking about this as I was on my way home. What would my first blog be about for Cam's Insane Life. I was on the phone with the Client as I was leaving work and I realized that this would be a perfect opportunity to talk about one of the "insane" things that I did. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing expecting a different result. The Client and Mr. Bond - I did the same thing, about three months apart, with the same result. Shocking, yes and no.

Insane problem: Expressing feelings through electronic communication.

Here's the background:

The Client and I have known each other for many years (at least since the end of elementary school, the beginning of Jr. High school). We actually had that whole I like you thing going on in Jr. high. You know, teenagers who can't express themselves properly, so they act like they don't like you when they really think the world of you. But we never took it past I like you, You like me. A big part of that had to deal with the Client's sister who was one of my best friends at the time and she was NOT havin' that foolishness. So we never got together and eventually lost contact. 

But good ole Facebook - it brings people together. We reconnected on Facebook after like 12 years. He invited me to his 30th birthday party and it was fine. It was the first time that we had seen each other since maybe 10th grade and not much had changed. Just a little taller and a little wider on both of our parts. So from that point on, we were pretty tight. Talking every day, spending time together, everything. It was almost like we backed into a relationship. We talked in the morning on my way to work, we talked when he woke up from his nap (he works the overnight), we talked when I got off work and/or went out to eat shortly after I got off work. We were spending a lot of time together.

I was heading on a trip early in the fall with my church. I called him when I got to the airport, giving him a hard time about me getting ready to leave and him not calling me. Mind you, I wasn't going to be gone long, but it would be some time apart. He said he's miss me (aww) but I told him that we would catch up when I got back. Between the time I left and the time I got back, we hadn't seen each other in two weeks which is a considerably long time for us. So I said let's go to dinner. When we'd go out to eat, we would alternate who paid, that is an interesting point. 

So I told him to meet me at Applebee's for dinner. He showed up a little tardy but it wasn't a huge deal because I kinda have a problem with punctuality myself. We got there, we were seated and it seemed like the night would go well. Besides we hadn't seen each other in a couple of weeks so it should be cool. Right, WRONG, WRONG, HELLA WRONG! Now as much as I love talking on the phone, there are just certain things that I don't really do while I'm out with someone. I try not to answer the phone when I'm out with someone. But if I have to, I'll keep it real brief. I don't have full conversations with someone while at the dinner table and I DEFINITELY don't invite a non mutual friend to join the dinner party. But this is what the Client did. He took a phone call from someone. It wasn't an urgent phone call. In fact, these foolios were talking about fantasy basketball. REALLY!??!?!? Did you really take this call during dinner about fantasy basketball? Okay. Adding insult to injury, the Client takes a SECOND call from his buddy, tells him where we are and tells him to come through and join us. WTF? Are you serious? By this time I had flipped the B*tch switch and was pissed. Not too mention, the Client did a whole lot of other things during dinner to drive me to taking Patron shots - like talking to other people in the restaurant for hella long, leaving me at the table and making goo goo eyes at the young waitress who looked no older than 20 - you would think that he knew better given his circumstance, but clearly not. Not a happy camper at all. And to make matters, worse we were getting really crappy service at the restaurant. With regards to the crappy house, we ordered an appetizer, drinks and our entrees.We got our entrees before our appetizers. When I asked about our appetizers, I told our waiter to cancel our appetizers since they didn't come when they needed to. The Client says, no go ahead and bring them out. Err?! WTH? So the waiter later brings out the appetizer which the Client and his friend indulge in. So if I wasn't already mad before, I am hotter than fish grease now. Did I mention that it was my time to pay for dinner. Yeah, about that...

So I am pretty polite to our guest at the table but I am giving the Client the business. I pay for dinner and we leave the restaurant. I walk to my car and drive off - mad as hell. I immediately start texting this punk letting him know that I am NOT pleased with the way the evening unfolded. We talk for a bit and he "says" he sees my point of view but also thought that I was overreacting. Cool, not really but okay. 

I then sit down at my laptop and begin to type. I send him this email, expressing to him how I felt about tonight and why he pissed me off so bad. I also said that I feel like with all the things that are going on, it seems like we need to just have sex and get it over with since it appears as though we clearly need to just get it out of our system. Ladies and gentlemen, we've just had our insane moment. 

The following week he contacts me electronically, says he got my email and wanted to know when the get down was finna go down. I told him, whenever he was ready (note: he wasn't). So I called him later in the week and basically said he needed to come over so we can get it done. He said he had plans but would come over when he was done. Cool. Long story less long (too late), he didn't show up and didn't call. His actions pissed me off considerably and subsequently led me to making a phone call to Mr. Bond. (insane point #2)

The background on Bond:

Our story is one that is similar to the story of me and the client. We've known each other since I was in the 8th grade as we went to Jr. High and High School together. James escorted me to the Winter Ball my Sr. Year. Afterwards, he tried to have sex with me in his car. Something should have told me then, to walk away from the foolishness. But I didn't. Part of the reason I asked him to come with me to the Winter Ball is because we'd known each other for some time and it would be fun, so I thought. I don't remember much about that night, other than having an attitude about something, being pissed and the whole thing about him trying to get me to have sex with him afterwards. 

So just like with the Client, I hadn't talk to Bond since maybe my freshman year at Howard. But that good ole Facebook strikes again. We become friends on Facebook. We reconnect. He says something about wanting to hang out. It was during the summer, so I suggested him coming down to one of my favorite night spots in Downtown Oakland. He gets there CONSIDERABLY late but we have a decent time. He comes back to the house afterwards and we start watching Transformers. We start making out but it wouldn't go anywhere. We talk a few times after that but because of the distance between us, we don't see each other often. In fact we don't see each other again I call him after the foolishness with the Client. 

I called him and told him that I needed a distraction and wondered if he was available to be such. We coordinated a time for him to come over and spend the night. Long story short (yeah I know it's too late) we had sex and it wasn't great. I was looking for something earth shattering and back breaking. Not so much. But his comfort and his compassion didn't go unnoticed. The next morning we hung out for a little while before we both had to go to church. 

At this point, Bond and I are talking a little bit more and hanging out on the weekends. While there was sex involved there were other things going on as well. Also at this point, the Client and I have stopped talking all together. This bootch tries to come up with some lame excuse as to why he didn't come over and as of today, I have only seen him once (I was sick and he brought me some supplies). Anyway, things with Bond and I aren't where things were with the Client and I, but they are two different guys of completely different characters or so I thought. 

Earlier this year, I sat down at my computer again and began typing an email to Bond. In said email, among other things, I told him that I liked him. NOT that I wanted to marry him by my next birthday, not that I wanted him to be my baby daddy, only that I liked him and thought (which traditionally gets me in trouble), it might be a good idea for us to consider dating. 

Needless to say the feelings were not returned, nor was the email even responded to - which speaks a lot to his real character. But there was a lesson for me to learn in both scenarios. In talking the situation with Chase, the banker, and he said that part of it was my fault. WHAT WHAT WHAT?!?!??! How could this be my fault? John Mayer says " Say what you need to say...even if your hands are shaking and your hearts wide open..." and I did that. But what Chase told me, is that I needed to have the conversations IN PERSON. 

The Moral of the Story:

By having the conversation in person, you communicate so much more effectively. You see facial expressions, body language, sincerity everything. Don't leave something that could be potentially serious, to be interpreted or misinterpreted by electronic communication. Don't even do something like this on the phone. Do it in person, or don't do it at all. 

Now that I familiar with the what the insane opportunity is, I can hopefully change it, so that I can stop the insanity. Until then, I'll just keep living this insane life.

Regular Contributors to Cam's Insane Life

(I may even have guest bloggers on Cam's Insane Life)

In theory this is the point where I put people on blast as they are regular contributors to My Insane Life, as I did in Miss Harvey's Blog, I will change the names of those mentioned so that I don't get my ass kicked. But the guilty parties I'm sure won't read my blog but maybe some of their friends will. Whatever - we'll just see what happens...

The Regular Contributors...

First up - The Co Workers

Uncle Kristoph - the cubie

The Tree Hugger - the new girl

Katy Perry - hot and cold 'nuff said

Gibbs - the Boss who went to the same school as DiNozzo, good thing she doesn't go around slappin' people on the back of the head, we'd have a serious problem

Director Shepherd - the bigger boss, kinda spacey, a lot on her plate has great intentions

Molly - she's the main cheerleader behind this whole thing

Miss MoneyPenny - Payroll - she got her sh*t too

B'Queta Crocker- the best bakin' sista this side of the Mississippi - the one on the other side of the 'Sip - my granny
Wilson - my neighbor across the fence **sorry for the late addition**

The Fam

Shug - dad

That Lady who gave birth to me, some days we're good, some days not so much

The Pampered Prince - the younger twin

The Ruff Ryder - the older twin

The Regular Boys

James Bond - he might not even be in the mix that long but he'll be mentioned at some point

The Client - this foolio, don't even know that I know

The Baby - he's pretty decent but he's also 6

Bob the Baker - he fell off for a while but I'm sure he's gonna make his reappearance real soon

Leonardo, the Ninja Turtle -  my crush that makes me smile EVERY TIME I see him, the definition of look but don't touch

Detective TenderRoni - he makes me smile too, when he isn't pissing me off - he's only pissed me off once but it was a doozy

Mr. Milk Dud - wow, the things...you're one of the ones I admire from a far

The Friends - 

The Professor - if he wasn't who he is to me, I'm kinda convinced we'd be dating

House - and I'm Wilson. Selfish and starved for attention, but brilliant and I love her. 

Ms. Raisinette - she's my cousin/sister and best friend rolled up into one. The thing is we really are related.

The Joker - he's coming into his own while living his own insane life

Bobby D - he's another one trying to navigate through his own insane life, the tough guy with a MAJOR chip on his shoulder

Beatrix Kiddo/The Bride - the things you do for friends who get married

In case you couldn't tell, I watch a lot of TV/movies

Welcome to Cam's Insane Life

Greetings and thank you for stopping my (other) blog. There will be some overlap between this one and Miss Harvey's Blog (www.msharveysblog.blogspot.com). However, this one will strictly deal with relationships, more specifically my somewhat dysfunctional relationships with guys (and maybe a few girls). 

I started talking about Cam's Insane Life with a co worker of mine some time before Christmas break. The idea was to do something like a talk show, just talking about the really stupid shit I go through. I couldn't quite flush out the ideas to make my talk show (but I'm sure it'll come around soon) but I thought that a blog would be a great place to start. Some of the stories will be funny, some of them won't be ha ha but I am pretty sure that at some point in time you will be able to relate to the stories. Not only will they be insane, hopefully there will be tips and ways for you to avoid making the same insane mistakes that I make. If not, we can laugh at ourselves together.